Some past events just won’t go away. You think they’re gone, something happens, and suddenly back in the moment. You immediately experience those powerful negative emotions as you revisit the terrible events which you just can’t forget or forgive. Indeed, the events may be such that it’s more a case of won’t forgive or forget. […]
One of the presuppositions of NLP is that there is no failure, only feedback. The premise is that if you view those results which are different from what you wanted as feedback rather than failure, you can learn from what you did and then do better. It’s a great notion. It flips your understanding on
A starting point in NLP are the presuppositions. They are a set of beliefs which, if you adopt them, support you to communicate more effectively, assist you as you grow and develop, and allow you to become more flexible in your approach and behaviour. The presuppositions are not factually true. They are, though, a way
I am often asked what NLP is, and when I tell people that NLP is the study of the structure of our subjective experience, I frequently get some very blank looks. We all experience the world in different ways, even when our experiences are objectively the same. We process and store information about our world
We go through life accruing experiences, some good, some bad, and some indifferent. We process those experiences and most end up safely stored in our memories. It’s all part of the amazing power of the unconscious mind. However, some memories just don’t resolve. For multiple reasons we keep those memories alive, reliving and revisiting them,
At the time of writing this, Christmas is but a few weeks away. You may have been planning the festivities for weeks, possibly months, maybe since the start of the year. Alternatively, you may find the approaching holiday season something you really wish to avoid. Obviously, you could be somewhere in between. I find myself
The NLP Model of Communication explains how we experience reality through our five senses. We process that sensory information, running it through a number of filters. We delete, distort and generalise. We feed it through experiences of time, energy, and matter, through memories and decisions, through preferences and attitudes. Finally, we store an internal representation
One of the presuppositions of NLP is that we can only evaluate behaviour and change in terms of context and ecology. That’s to say, we can only evaluate change if we firstly understand the circumstances in which change has taken place. Secondly, we can only make that evaluation if we can confirm that everyone benefits,
The art of effective communication is, in my view, reaching a shared understanding of an issue or a situation. We don’t have to agree. Indeed, we can agree to disagree. However, if we have communicated effectively, I understand you and you understand me. We can each represent accurately what the other has said. Easy, isn’t
Those of you who read my blog regularly will know that NLP underpins all of the work that I do as a coach. Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) as a concept has been with us since the 1970s, the work of John Grinder and Richard Bandler. And describing it as a concept is somewhat misleading. It is