The NLP Model of Communication explains how we experience reality through our five senses. We process that sensory information, running it through a number of filters. We delete, distort and generalise. We feed it through experiences of time, energy, and matter, through memories and decisions, through preferences and attitudes. Finally, we store an internal representation […]
Almost all of us, I’m sure, have people in our lives. Friends, family, partners, neighbours, colleagues. The list goes on. Some of us will be delighted by the people we have around us. We’ll note the joy they bring, and how the relationships enrich our lives. The truth is, though, that not everyone has the
When meeting with clients, I often ask how life is going. Many talk about work, family, friends with little enthusiasm. When challenged about the lack of excitement, some refer to life not being what they envisaged as they moved into the world of adulthood. Something happens that leads us to lose that giddy excitement from
I had a client who was overcoming addiction, in recovery from cocaine addiction. He explained that it had all started so well, with the occasional line of cocaine at the weekend. The drug gave him the ability to party a little bit longer and drink a little bit more. He noted that it was hard
One of the presuppositions of NLP is that we can only evaluate behaviour and change in terms of context and ecology. That’s to say, we can only evaluate change if we firstly understand the circumstances in which change has taken place. Secondly, we can only make that evaluation if we can confirm that everyone benefits,
For most, if not all, of us the labels we acquire as we go through life bind us. Firstly, we’re children, parents, brothers, sisters, wives, husbands, and partners. Additionally, we take on job titles, roles within our families, and the labels we give to ourselves. Others impose labels on us, just as we impose labels
I recently visited some friends. I hadn’t been for a while. Much had changed yet so much remained the same. Isn’t that the same with friends? We’re all getting older yet the bonds that bind remain as strong as ever. During the trip I was able to get out and visit the tree which we
We’re all aware of what stress is, or at least I assume that we’re all aware. There’s enough out there about the nature of stress, the risks of being stressed and, seemingly, an endless number of ways of managing it. The message it appears, is simple: stress is bad and we must take steps to
I’m fairly confident that we all, at times, think about things we’d like to do and have. Those fleeting daydreams of a better future. We allow our imaginations to run a little bit wild. And then we turn back to reality. The dreams, the aspirations, the hopes, all gone in an instant. It’s time to
One of my more recent clients came to me because they were experiencing overwhelming anxiety. It had gone beyond the point of feeling uncomfortable. They were now ready to take action, realising that confronting the anxiety was the lesser of two evils. And it’s an interesting thought. Some people continue with the bad feelings simply